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I considered eating something from the supply pile in the hole—after all； I’d already damaged pretty
much everything； maybe destroyed some。 But that only made me feel guiltier about the idea of taking
more。 I’d go scavenge some rolls from the kitchen。
I was feeling a little hurt； on top of all the big hurt； that I’d been down here so long without anyone
ing to look for me—what a vain attitude； why should anyone care what happened to me？—so I was
relieved and appeased to find Jamie sitting in the doorway to the big garden； his back turned on the
human world behind him； unmistakably waiting for me。
My eyes brightened； and so did his。 He scrambled to his feet； relief washing over his features。
“You’re okay；” he said； I wished he were right。 He began to ramble。 “I mean； I didn’t think Jared was
lying； but he said he thought you wanted to be alone； and Jeb said I couldn’t go check on you and that I
had to stay right here where he could see that I wasn’t sneaking back there； but even though I didn’t
think you were hurt or anything； it was hard to not know for sure； you know？”
“I’m fine；” I told him。 But I held my arms out； seeking fort。 He threw his arms around my waist； and
I was shocked to find that his head could rest on my shoulder while we stood。
“Your eyes are red；” he whispered。 “Was he mean to you？”
“No。” After all； people weren’t intentionally cruel to lab rats—they were just trying to get information。
“Whatever you said to him； I think he believes us now。 About Mel； I mean。 How does she feel？”
“She’s glad about that。”
He nodded； pleased。 “How about you？”
I hesitated； looking for a factual response。 “Telling the truth is easier for me than trying to hide it。”
My evasion seemed to answer the question enough to satisfy him。
Behind him； the light in the garden was red and fading。 The sun had already set on the desert。
“I’m hungry；” I told him； and I pulled away from our hug。
“I knew you would be。 I saved you something good。”
I sighed。 “Bread’s fine。”
“Let it go； Wanda。 Ian says you’re too self…sacrificing for your own good。”
I made a face。
“I think he’s got a point；” Jamie muttered。 “Even if we all want you here； you don’t belong until you
“I can’t ever belong。 And nobody really wants me here； Jamie。”
“I do。”
I didn’t fight with him； but he was wrong。 Not lying； because he believed what he was saying。 But what
he really wanted was Melanie。 He didn’t separate us the way he should。
Trudy and Heidi were baking rolls in the kitchen and sharing a bright green； juicy apple。 They took turns
taking bites。
“It’s good to see you； Wanda；” Trudy said sincerely； covering her mouth while she spoke because she
was still chewing her last bite。 Heidi nodded in greeting； her teeth sunk in the apple。 Jamie nudged me；
trying to be inconspicuous about it—pointing out that people wanted me。 He wasn’t making allowances
for mon courtesy。
“Did you save her dinner？” he asked eagerly。
“Yep；” Trudy said。 She bent down beside the oven and came back with a metal tray in her hand。 “Kept
it warm。 It’s probably nasty and tough now； but it’s better than the usual。”
On the tray was a rather large piece of red meat。 My mouth started to water； even as I rejected the
portion I’d been allotted。
“It’s too much。”
“We have to eat all the perishables the first day；” Jamie encouraged me。 “Everyone eats themselves
sick—it’s a tradition。”
“You need the protein；” Trudy added。 “We were on cave rations too long。 I’m surprised no one’s in
worse shape。”
I ate my protein while Jamie watched with hawk…like attention as each bite traveled from the tray to my
mouth。 I ate it all to please him； though it made my stomach ache to eat so much。
The kitchen started to fill up again as I was finishing。 A few had apples in their hands—all sharing with
someone else。 Curious eyes examined the sore side of my face。
“Why’s everyone ing here now？” I muttered to Jamie。 It was black outside； the dinner hour long
over。
Jamie looked at me blankly for a second。 “To hear you teach。” His tone added the wordsof course。
“Are you kidding me？”
“I told you nothing’s changed。”
I stared around the narrow room。 It wasn’t a full house。 No Doc tonight； and none of the returned
raiders； which meant no Paige； either。 No Jeb； no Ian； no Walter。 A few others missing： Travis； Carol；
Ruth Ann。 But more than I would have thought； if I’d thought anyone would consider following the
“Can we go back to the Dolphins； where we left off？” Wes asked； interrupting my evaluation of the
room。 I could see that he’d taken it upon himself to start the ball rolling； rather than that he was vitally
interested in the kinship circles of an alien planet。
Everyone looked at me expectantly。 Apparently； life was not changing as much as I’d thought。
I took a tray of rolls from Heidi’s hands and turned to shove it into the stone oven。 I started talking with
my back still turned。
“So… um… hmm… the； uh； third set of grandparents… They traditionally serve the munity； as they
see it。 On Earth； they would be the breadwinners； the ones who leave the home and bring back
sustenance。 They are farmers； for the most part。 They cultivate a plant…like growth that they milk for its
sap。…”
And life went on。
Jamie tried to talk me out of sleeping in the supply corridor； but his attempt was halfhearted。 There just
wasn’t another place for me。 Stubborn as usual； he insisted on sharing my quarters。 I imagined Jared
didn’t like that； but as I didn’t see him that night or the next day； I couldn’t verify my theory。
It was awkward again； going about my usual chores； with the six raiders home—just like when Jeb had
first forced me to join the munity。 Hostile stares； angry silences。 It was harder for them than it was for
me； though—Iwas used to it。 They； on the other hand； were entirely unaccustomed to the way everyone
else treated me。 When I was helping with the corn harvest； for example； and Lily thanked me for a fresh
basket with a smile； Andy’s eyes bulged in their sockets at the exchange。 Or when I was waiting for the
bathing pool with Trudy and Heidi； and Heidi began playing with my hair。 It was growing； always
swinging in my eyes these days； and I was planning to shear it off again。 Heidi was trying to find a style
for me； flipping the strands this way and that。 Brandt and Aaron—Aaron was the oldest man who’d gone
on the long raid； someone I couldn’t remember having seen before at all—came out and found us there；
Trudy laughing at some silly atrocity Heidi was attempting to create atop my head； and both men turned a
little green and stalked silently past us。
Of course； little things like that were nothing。 Kyle roamed the caves now； and though he was obviously
under orders to leave me in peace； his expression made it clear that this restriction was repugnant to him。
I was always with others when I crossed his path； and I wondered if that was the only reason he did
nothing more than gl