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now。 Whether you enjoy your life continuously； or constantly harass yourself；
depends upon how well you learn to simply change what is changeable
without throwing people out of your heart and then quietly accept that
which you cannot change except by heavy subject…object manipulation and
force。
In being aware of how your rational mind operates to alienate you from
people； you will need to watch for the “chain…reaction effect。” Let’s suppose
you enjoy being with a person and you have many things in mon that
draw you together。 Then suppose you have one strong addiction that leads
you to be angry and throw this person out of your heart。 Unless you can
quickly get on top of this addiction and bee more conscious； you will find
that the alienating attitude triggered by your addiction will spread like a
cancer and cause you to bee critical of this person in other ways that have
nothing to do with the original addiction。 Your rational mind is simply
prostituting itself to the unconscious workings of the ego and your addictive
programming。 You will begin to feel separate and alien toward this person in
one way after another。 Your rational mind will check back in the memory
files and begin to reinterpret past events to “cast a new light on them”
purporting to show that the relationship really wasn’t as beautiful as it seemed
at the time。 It will carefully rehash both the past and the present in the light
of your other security； sensation； and power addictions and will tend to blow
up little things into big separating “problems。”
For example； let’s suppose Tom and Mary are married； and they have a
mutually loving； flowing relationship。 Suppose Tom needs to go to a nightand…
day business conference in a city a thousand miles away。 Since he will
be busy all the time； he prefers not to take Mary with him。 Suppose Mary has
an addiction for going on this trip with Tom。 Her Power Center of
Consciousness is demanding that Tom not leave her at home alone overnight。
Unless she can bee conscious of what she is doing to herself with this
emotion…backed addictive model； her rational mind may suggest to her that
Tom is getting tired of her； Tom wants to have an affair with someone else；
Tom is on a heavy power trip and does not really love her； the rest of their
lives together will probably be clouded by Tom’s leaving her at home more
and more often； perhaps Tom is ashamed of her and doesn’t want his business
associates to meet her； etc。； etc。 There is no end to the nonsense that the
rational mind can spin out as the pawn of the ego。 A person growing into
higher consciousness learns to spot this sewer…like churning and spewing and
refuses to let the rational mind’s activity trigger any negative emotions。 You
may expect to have many real battles with your rational mind in order to stay
conscious。
Just like any plex machine； our rational mind can make a beautiful
contribution to our well…being if we are keenly sensitive to its limitations and
problem areas。 The techniques of the Living Love Way will enable you to
bee an expert “trouble…shooter” so that your rational mind can work for
you and not against you。 Your rational mind is a master at proving that you
are “right” and the other person is “wrong。” But in order to be a
conscious； loving； happy； and fulfilled being； it is not enough to be “right。”
You can be “right” in your individual contracts and in your performance of
society’s games and live a thoroughly miserable； alienated； unhappy life。
We all know people who are “correct” and “right” almost all of the time
and the lives of these people do not work to produce happiness。 It’s much
more fulfilling to be loved than to be “right。” Love brings more happiness
than efficiency。 It’s often better to give other people space to find their own
errors or to let the natural chain of events in their life show them where they
have to change。 If a person asks you if you think he is right； you should then
open yourself pletely and give him the benefit of your thoughts and
feelings。 But arguing at every opportunity in order to convince people that
you are right and others are wrong simply means that you are trapped by your
rational mind and are unconsciously and mechanically acting out your
security； sensation； and power addictions。
A Zen master had a beautiful young lady as his pupil。 She became pregnant；
and she falsely named her teacher as the father of her child。 When the child
was born； her family indignantly brought the child to the Zen master and
accused him of taking advantage of his beautiful young pupil。 His only reply
was； “Ah so。” They left the child with the Zen master； who enjoyed caring
for it and had many beautiful hours playing with the child。 After about a year
the young lady was very ill； and not wanting to die with this false accusation
on her conscience； she told her family that the real father was a young man
who lived in a nearby town。 Her mother and father immediately went to the
teacher and profoundly bowed and apologized and asked for the baby back。
The Zen master gave them the baby and said； “Ah so。”
When they first accused him； the rational mind of the Zen master did not get
caught up in a big chain of ego…backed arguments indignantly denying that he
was the father； protesting that he was unjustly accused； threatening to tell
people about the lie that was being perpetrated upon him； etc。 He realized
that a mother and father are not likely to believe the word of a man against
the word of their pregnant daughter。 He simply saw that they were not open
and did not want to hear his side of it。 They did not ask him whether he had
done it they accusingly told him he had done it。 And so the Zen master
simply flowed with the drama being enacted and did not agree or disagree。
He stayed in a peaceful state of higher consciousness and simply enjoyed
what was going on and he was able to have the fun of living with the baby
for a while。 When they came back and apologized for their false accusations；
his rational mind did not say； “I could have told you； but you wouldn’t have
listened。” He simply peacefully saw that they now understood and there was
nothing to be said。 He could continue to enjoy the new act in the drama。
This story does not tell us that we must never give our side of things in any
situation。 It simply says that when you are conscious； you have a choice as to
whether to get in a discussion because you know in advance whether the
argument will bring you and the other person into a closer state of love and
oneness or whether it will separate you。 Under the circumstances； the Zen
Master’s reply； “Ah so；” was the best reply to produce the closest harmony
that could be obtained in that situation。 Later he willingly and lovingly gave
the child up without recriminations。 For all concerned this also represented a
flowingly harmonious thing to do。 Most people with whom you interact will
be more open than the parents of the pregnant girl。 Usually you will be able
to use the Seventh Pathway； which tells you to open yourself pletely to
other people。 But also use the Ninth Pathway； to open yourself in a