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The old count sometimes came up to Prince Andrey； kissed him and asked his advice about some question relating to Petya’s education or Nikolay’s position。 The old countess sighed as she looked at them。 Sonya was afraid every instant of being in their way； and was always trying to find excuses for leaving them alone； even when they had no wish to be alone。 When Prince Andrey talked—he described things very well—Natasha listened to him with pride。 When she talked； she noticed with joy and dread that he watched her with an intent and scrutinising look。 She asked herself in perplexity： “What is it he seeks in me？ What is it he is probing for with that look？ What if I haven’t in me what he is searching for in that look？” Sometimes she fell into the mood of wild gaiety characteristic of her； and then she particularly loved to see and hear how Prince Andrey laughed。 He rarely laughed； but when he did laugh he abandoned himself utterly to his mirth； and she always felt herself drawn closer to him by this laughter。 Natasha would have been perfectly happy if the thought of the separation before her； coming closer and closer； had not terrified her。 He too turned pale and cold at the mere thought of it。
On the day before he was to leave Petersburg； Prince Andrey brought with him Pierre； who had not been at the Rostovs’ since the day of the ball。 Pierre seemed absent…minded and embarrassed。 He talked chiefly to the countess。 Natasha was sitting at the chess…board with Sonya； and invited Prince Andrey to join them。 He went to them。
“You have known Bezuhov a long while； haven’t you？” he asked。 “Do you like him？”
“Yes； he’s very nice； but very absurd。”
And she began； as people always did when speaking of Pierre； to tell anecdotes of his absent…mindedness； anecdotes which were made up； indeed； about him。
“You know； I have confided our secret to him；” said Prince Andrey。 “I have known him from childhood。 He has a heart of gold。 I beg you； Natalie；” he said； with sudden seriousness； “I am going away； God knows what may happen。 You may change … Oh； I know I ought not to speak of that。 Only one thing—if anything were to happen to you； while I am away …”
“What could happen？”
“If any trouble were to come；” pursued Prince Andrey。 “I beg you； Mademoiselle Sophie； if anything were to happen； to go to him and no one else for advice and help。 He is a most absent…minded and eccentric person； but he has the truest heart。”
Neither her father nor her mother； neither Sonya nor Prince Andrey could have foreseen the effect of the parting on Natasha。 She wandered about the house all that day； flushed； excited； and tearless； busying herself about the most trivial matters as though she had no notion of what was before her。 She did not weep even at the moment when he kissed her hand for the last time。
“Don’t go away！” was all she said； in a voice that made him wonder whether he ought not really to remain； and that he remembered long after。 When he had gone； she still did not weep； but for several days she sat in her room； not crying； but taking no interest in anything； and only saying from time to time： “Oh； why did he go？” But a fortnight after his departure； she surprised those around her equally by recovering from her state of spiritual sickness； and became herself again； only with a change in her moral physiognomy； such as one sees in the faces of children after a long illness。
Chapter 25
THE HEALTH AND CHARACTER of Prince Nikolay Andreitch Bolkonsky had； during that year； after his son had left him； grown considerably feebler。 He became more irritable than ever； and it was Princess Marya who as a rule bore the brunt of his outbursts of causeless fury。 He seemed studiously to seek out all the tender spots in her consciousness so as to inflict on her the cruellest wounds possible。 Princess Marya had two passions and consequently two joys： her nephew； Nikolushka； and religion； and both were favourite subjects for the old prince’s attacks and jeers。 Whatever was being spoken of； he would bring the conversation round to the superstitiousness of old maids； or the petting and spoiling of children。 “You want to make him” （Nikolushka） “just such another old maid as you are yourself。 Prince Andrey wants a son and not an old maid；” he would say。 Or addressing Mademoiselle Bourienne he would ask her； before Princess Marya； how she liked our village priests and holy pictures； and make jests about them。…
He was constantly wounding Princess Marya’s feelings； but his daughter needed no effort to forgive him。 Could he be to blame in anything he did to her； could her father； who as she knew in spite of it all； loved her； be unjust？ And indeed what is justice？ Princess Marya never gave a thought to that proud word； “justice。” All the complex laws of humanity were summed up for her in one clear and simple law—the law of love and self…sacrifice； laid down by Him who had in His love suffered for humanity； though He was God Himself。 What had she to do with the justice or injustice of other people？ All she had to do was to suffer and to love； and that she did。
In the winter Prince Andrey had come to Bleak Hills； had been gay； gentle； and affectionate； as Princess Marya had not seen him for years。 She felt that something had happened to him； but he said nothing to his sister of his love。 Before his departure； Prince Andrey had a long conversation with his father； and Princess Marya noticed that they were ill pleased with each other at parting。
Soon after Prince Andrey had gone； Princess Marya wrote from Bleak Hills to her friend in Petersburg； Julie Karagin； whom Princess Marya had dreamed—as girls always do dream—of marrying to her brother。 She was at this time in mourning for the death of a brother； who had been killed in Turkey。
“Sorrow； it seems； is our common lot； my sweet and tender friend Julie。
“Your loss is so terrible that I can only explain it to myself； as a special sign of the grace of God； who in His love for you would chasten you and your incomparable mother。
“Ah； my dear； religion； and religion alone can—I don’t say comfort us—but save us from despair。 Religion alone can interpret to us what； without its aid； man cannot comprehend： to what end； for what cause； good； elevated beings who are able to find happiness in life； not injuring others； but indispensable to their happiness； are called away to God； while the wicked； the useless； injuring others and a burden to themselves and others； are left living。 The first death which I have seen； and which I shall never forget—the death of my dear little sister…in…law—made on me just the same impression。 Just as you question destiny； and ask why your noble brother had to die； so did I wonder what reason there was for that angel Liza to die—who had never done the slightest harm to any one； never even had a thought in her heart that was not kind。 And yet—do you know； dear friend—five years have passed since then； and even I； with my poor intelligence； begin now to understand clearly why it was needful she should die； and in what way that death was but an expression of the boundless grace of the Creator； all of whose acts； though for the most part we compr