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屋顶间的哲学家_梭维斯特-第章

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eam;itakemytincanoffthehookandgodowntothemilkwomans。

    motherdenisisahalecountrywomanfromsavoy;whichsheleftwhenquiteyoung;and;contrarytothecustomofthesavoyards;shehasnotgonebacktoitagain。shehasneitherhusbandnorchild;notwithstandingthetitletheygiveher;butherkindness;whichneversleeps;makesherworthyofthenameofmother。

    abravecreature!leftbyherselfinthebattleoflife;shemakesgoodherhumbleplaceinitbyworking;singing;helpingothers;andleavingtheresttogod。

    atthedoorofthemilk…shopihearloudburstsoflaughter。inoneofthecornersoftheshopthreechildrenaresittingontheground。theywearthesootydressofsavoyardboys;andintheirhandstheyholdlargeslicesofbreadandcheese。theyoungestisbesmeareduptotheeyeswithhis;andthatisthereasonoftheirmirth。

    motherdenispointsthemouttome。

    〃lookatthelittlelambs;howtheyenjoythemselves!〃saidshe;puttingherhandontheheadofthelittleglutton。

    〃hehashadnobreakfast;〃putsinoneoftheothersbywayofexcuse。

    〃poorlittlething;〃saidthemilkwoman;〃heisleftaloneinthestreetsofparis;wherehecanfindnootherfatherthantheall…goodgod!〃

    〃andthatiswhyyoumakeyourselfamothertothem?〃ireplied;gently。

    〃whatidoislittleenough;〃saidmotherdenis;measuringoutmymilk;〃buteverydayigetsomeofthemtogetheroutofthestreet;thatforoncetheymayhaveenoughtoeat。dearchildren!theirmotherswillmakeupforitinheaven。nottomentionthattheyrecallmynativemountainstome:whentheysinganddance;iseemtoseeouroldfatheragain。〃

    herehereyesfilledwithtears。

    〃soyouarerepaidbyyourrecollectionsforthegoodyoudothem?〃

    resumedi。

    〃yes!yes!〃saidshe;〃andbytheirhappiness;too!thelaughteroftheselittleones;sir;islikeabirdssong;itmakesyougay;andgivesyouhearttolive。〃

    asshespokeshecutsomefreshslicesofbreadandcheese;andaddedsomeapplesandahandfulofnutstothem。

    〃e;mylittledears;〃shecried;〃puttheseintoyourpocketsagainstto…morrow。〃

    then;turningtome:

    〃to…dayiamruiningmyself;〃addedshe;〃butwemustallhaveourcarnival。〃

    icameawaywithoutsayingaword:iwastoomuchaffected。

    atlastihavediscoveredwhattruepleasureis。afterbeholdingtheegotismofsensualityandofintellect;ihavefoundthehappyself…sacrificeofgoodness。pierre;m。antoine;andmotherdenishadallkepttheircarnival;butforthefirsttwo;itwasonlyafeastforthesensesorthemind;whileforthethird;itwasafeastfortheheart。



 CHAPTER III

    whatwemaylearnbylookingoutofwindow

    march3d

    apoethassaidthatlifeisthedreamofashadow:hewouldbetterhaveparedittoanightoffever!whatalternatefitsofrestlessnessandsleep!whatdisfort!whatsuddenstarts!whatever…returningthirst!

    whatachaosofmournfulandconfusedfancies!wecanneithersleepnorwake;weseekinvainforrepose;andwestopshortonthebrinkofaction。twothirdsofhumanexistencearewastedinhesitation;andthelastthirdinrepenting。

    whenisayhumanexistence;imeanmyown!wearesomadethateachofusregardshimselfasthemirrorofthemunity:whatpassesinourmindsinfalliblyseemstousahistoryoftheuniverse。everymanislikethedrunkardwhoreportsanearthquake;becausehefeelshimselfstaggering。

    andwhyamiuncertainandrestless鈥斺€攊;apoorday…laborerintheworld鈥斺€攚hofillanobscurestationinacornerofit;andwhoseworkitavailsitselfof;withoutheedingtheworkman?iwilltellyou;myunseenfriend;forwhomtheselinesarewritten;myunknownbrother;onwhomthesolitarycallinsorrow;myimaginaryconfidant;towhomallmonologuesareaddressedandwhoisbuttheshadowofourownconscience。

    agreateventhashappenedinmylife!acrossroadhassuddenlyopenedinthemiddleofthemonotonouswayalongwhichiwastravellingquietly;andwithoutthinkingofit。tworoadspresentthemselves;andimustchoosebetweenthem。oneisonlythecontinuationofthatihavefollowedtillnow;theotheriswider;andexhibitswondrousprospects。

    onthefirstthereisnothingtofear;butalsolittletohope;ontheotheraregreatdangersandgreatfortune。briefly;thequestionis;whetherishallgiveupthehumbleofficeinwhichithoughttodie;foroneofthoseboldspeculationsinwhichchancealoneisbanker!eversinceyesterdayihaveconsultedwithmyself;ihaveparedthetwoandiremainundecided。

    whereshallifindlight鈥斺€攚howilladviseme?

    sunday;4th鈥斺€攕eethesuningoutfromthethickfogsofwinter!

    springannouncesitsapproach;asoftbreezeskimsovertheroofs;andmywallflowerbeginstoblowagain。

    wearenearthatsweetseasonoffreshgreen;ofwhichthepoetsofthesixteenthcenturysangwithsomuchfeeling:

    nowthegladsomemonthofmay。

    allthingsnewlydotharray;fairestlady;letmetoo。

    inthylovemyliferenew。

    thechirpingofthesparrowscallsme:theyclaimthecrumbsiscattertothemeverymorning。iopenmywindow;andtheprospectofroofsopensoutbeforemeinallitssplendor。

    hewhohaslivedonlyonafirstfloorhasnoideaofthepicturesquevarietyofsuchaview。hehasnevercontemplatedthesetile…coloredheightswhichintersecteachother;hehasnotfollowedwithhiseyesthesegutter…valleys;wherethefreshverdureoftheatticgardenswaves;thedeepshadowswhicheveningspreadsovertheslatedslopes;andthesparklingofwindowswhichthesettingsunhaskindledtoablazeoffire。hehasnotstudiedthefloraofthesealpsofcivilization;carpetedbylichensandmosses;heisnotacquaintedwiththemyriadinhabitantsthatpeoplethem;fromthemicroscopicinsecttothedomesticcat鈥斺€攖hatreynardoftheroofswhoisalwaysontheprowl;orinambush;hehasnotwitnessedthethousandaspectsofaclearoracloudysky;northethousandeffectsoflight;thatmaketheseupperregionsatheatrewithever…changingscenes!howmanytimeshavemydaysofleisurepassedawayincontemplatingthiswonderfulsight;indiscoveringitsdarkerorbrighterepisodes;inseeking;inshort;inthisunknownworldfortheimpressionsoftravelthatwealthytouristslookforlower!

    nineoclock鈥斺€攂utwhy;then;havenotmywingedneighborspickedupthecrumbsihavescatteredforthembeforemywindow?iseethemflyaway;eback;perchupontheledgesofthewindows;andchirpatthesightofthefeasttheyareusuallysoreadytodevour!itisnotmypresencethatfrightensthem;ihaveaccustomedthemtoeatoutofmyhand。then;whythisfearfulsuspense?invainilookaround:theroofisclear;thewindowsnearareclosed。icrumblethebreadthatremainsfrommybreakfasttoattractthembyanamplerfeast。theirchirpingsincrease;theybenddowntheirheads;theboldestapproachuponthewing;butwithoutdaringtoalight。

    e;e;mysparrowsarethevictimsofoneofthefoolishpanicswhichmakethefundsfallatthebourse!itisplainthatbirdsarenotmorereasonablethanmen!

    withthisreflectioniwasabouttoshutmywindow;whensuddenlyiperceived;inaspotofsunshineonmyright;theshadowoftwopricked…upears;thenapawadvanced;thentheheadofatabby…catshoweditselfatthecornerofthegutter。thecunningfellowwaslyingthereinwait;hopingthecrumbswouldbringhimsomegame。

    andihadaccusedmyguestsofcowardice!iwassosurethatnodangercouldmenacethem!ithoughtihadlookedwelleverywhere!ihadonlyforgottenthecornerbehindme!

    inlife;asontheroofs;howmanymisfortunesefromhavingforgottenasinglecorner!

    tenoclock鈥斺€攊cannotleavemywindow;therainandthecoldhavekeptitshutsolongthatimustreconnoitrealltheenvironstobeabletotakepossessionofthemagain。myeyessearchinsuccessionallthepointsofthejumbledandconfusedprospect;passingonorstoppingaccordingtowhattheylightupon。

    ah!seethewindowsuponwhichtheyformerlylovedtorest;theyarethoseoftwounknownneighbors;whosedifferenthabitstheyhavelongremarked。

    oneisapoorwork…woman;whorisesbeforesunrise;andwhoseprofileisshadoweduponherlittlemuslinwindow…curtainfarintotheevening;theotherisayoungsongstress;whosevocalflouri
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